1. Trudeau wins Liberal leadership in landslide vote
Justin Trudeau has won the federal Liberal leadership race with a commanding 80 per cent of the vote. Trudeau vowed to unite all Liberals, regardless of past political association.
“I don’t care if you thought my father was great or arrogant,” said Trudeau during his coronation. “It doesn’t matter to me if you were a Chretien-Liberal, a Turner-Liberal, a Martin-Liberal or any other kind of Liberal. The era of hyphenated Liberals ends right here, tonight.”
Today’s question period should be an exceptionally volatile one, with Trudeau facing off against Prime Minister Stephen Harper for the first time as Liberal leader. Here’s to hoping he can sucker the prime minister into boxing him à la Sen. Patrick Brazeau. [Winnipeg Free Press, CBC]
2. Chávez successor “wins” Venezuelan election
In a less-than-surprising turn of events, Nicolás Maduro has won the Venezuelan presidential election with 51 per cent of the vote. His opponent, Henrique Capriles, is asking for a recount, claiming that there are too many incidents of voting fraud to call it a legitimate election. Considering that Madura is the late Hugo Chávez’s hand-picked protégé, Capriles has reason for suspicion, though he might eventually see the silver lining in his loss of not having to take over the crime-ridden and economically ruined legacy of Chávez. [Atlantic]
3. Twitter Titanic sinks over the weekend
Twitter users following @TitanicRealTime will be disappointed to hear that, on Sunday, the ship did in fact sink. To commemorate the 101st anniversary of the disastrous event, @TitanicRealTime, a feed run by The History Press, has been (kind of) live-tweeting the journey of the Titanic since April 10. As you might have expected, Twitter users had all sorts of smart-ass witticisms to contribute to the discussion. [Daily Dot]
4. Trick-shot kicker signed by Detroit Lions
Norwegian YouTube star Havard Rugland has been signed by the Detroit Lions after his incredible trick-shot video entitled Kickalicious took off online. The four minute video features Rugland kicking the ball into garbage cans, basketball hoops, and making consecutive 60, 50, 40, and 30 yard field goals (for context, there are only 12 NFL kickers who’ve ever successfully kicked 60 yards or further in a game). Last year, Rugland tried out for the New York Jets but was turned away because his trainers weren’t confident that he’d be able to play under the immense pressure of the NFL. [Guardian]
5. ‘Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead’ hits #2 spot on British charts
The recent death of Margaret Thatcher has led to an amazingly tasteless trend in Britain. The Wizard of Oz tune ‘Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead’ hit the number two spot on the British music charts after it sold more than 52,000 copies, likely to be played at a bunch of nastily-themed parties. Ironically, some of the royalties from the craze went to composer Andrew Lloyd Webber, a long-time Conservative and Thatcher admirer. [Atlantic, Daily Mail]
Mark Schram grew up on a ranch in southwestern Manitoba and now writes out of Winnipeg. If you would like to offer him a job or ask him about how to pull a calf, you can contact him at email@example.com.