Prairie Post

5 things you absolutely must know today (weekend edition)

The doomsday bunker displayed in Craigslist personal ad.

Every morning, we scour the Internet and vet what we believe are the five things you absolutely need to know for the day. Join this mailing list to receive 5 things you absolutely must know today every morning, Monday to Friday, by 8 a.m.  

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Editor’s note: We added an extra news item to today’s 5 things after learning about the release of the kidnapped schoolgirls in Nigeria.

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Boko Haram to release abducted schoolgirls

Islamic militant group Boko Haram has agreed to a truce and will be releasing schoolgirls they abducted, according to Nigeria’s military. The group kidnapped more than 200 girls from a school in the northeast town of Chibok six months ago. The truce was revealed at the conclusion of a three-day meeting between Nigeria and Cameroon. Nigerian presidential aide Hassan Tukur told the BBC that the ceasefire was the result of a month of negotiations that were mediated by Chad. The truce has the blessing of Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau, according to the BBC. Further details surrounding the release of the schoolgirls are not known at this time. [Source:BBC]

South Korean music-festival accident kills 14, raises fears over safety protocols

At least 14 people are feared dead after a ventilation gate collapsed during a local music festival in Seongnam, South Korea, according to news reports. A group of 20 to 30 concertgoers standing on the grate fell 65 feet to an underground parking lot. Rescue crews are still at the scene. Local news agency, Yonhap, reported that about 700 people had gathered at the multi-plex Pangyo Techno Valley to watch the popular, Korean band 4Minute. After the Sewol ferry sank killing more than 300 people six months ago, some fear this most recent incident will only increase skepticism over the country’s safety protocols. [Source: BBC]

Man seeking fertile woman with small-arms experience for Ebola apocalypse

Well, ladies. Fertile ladies, specifically. This man wants to hear from you: Hi, I’m batshit crazy. And I want you to live with me in a creepy “bug out” shelter I’ve been building in the Vermont Mountains for the past 10 years. My biggest fear? Oh boy. Good question. I’d have to say it’s emerging from my shelter, 10-15 years from now, single, only to find out Ebola has wiped out the human race and I’ll have no means to keep the race alive. What do I look for in a partner? Umm. Small arms experience, mostly. No. Wait. That’s important, but fertility. Fertility is what I want. Ladies, act now. He’s retreating to his bunker in two weeks time. The ad appeared on Craigslist Boston late Tuesday night. The man behind the post claims to have built a self-sustaining shelter, and, it seems, is formally asking for a fertile woman with arms experience to stay with him. Boston.com reached out to the writer of the post, and discovered it a ruse. But, sadly, some of the responses to it were serious: “I am sure you are inundated with replies to your ad. I know you are right and the country as we know it is about to end,” wrote Angela, who claimed to be a 34-year-old mother of three girls living in Milford. And another response: “I am fertile, healthy and fit. Please let me hear back from you that this is legit as well as a little more about yourself.” See full ad below:

Ebola is about to break loose in America. It’s already in Dallas and Atlanta. Boston will be its next stop I am sure and soon airplanes, taxis, and the T will not be safe. Don’t wait for it to be too late. I have been prepping for about 10 years in the Vermont mountains and have a hidden sustainable bug out shelter well off the grid and completely self sufficient. I only fear that by going there now, alone, I will emerge in 10-15 years to find humanity has succumbed to this modern day plague and I will have no way to keep the species going.

I plan to wait no longer than 2 weeks to head out. I have enclosed some pictures of my shelter so you can see this is for real and it is not going to be completely rustic. If you already have children and wish to bring them then I think that is a good idea, and if not that is fine too. I request that you are fertile and able to bear at least three children with me should we find ourselves in a situation where a decade or more passes before it is safe to emerge. If you have small arms experience or hunting experience that is a big plus.

I have already transferred my life savings into gold and I recommend you do the same even if you choose not to respond or try to survive with me. It is almost certain that even if humanity doesn’t crumble that at the very least our monetary system and possibly our government will.

This could be the best decision you ever make in your life. Choose adventure and take control of your destiny instead of waiting and hoping that the government will fix this for you. I await your message. [Source: Boston.com]

Ukraine-Russia-Europe talks marred by inflexibility

Russia, Ukraine, and European governments met Friday to iron out kinks in the ceasefire that has so far been mostly nominal, and find a solution for an ongoing gas-supply dispute. The Kremlin reported that the talks were “full of misunderstandings and disagreements,” and that specific people weren’t able to budge on an “absolute biased, non-flexible, non-diplomatic” approach to Ukraine. Putin, known for bias and inflexibility, said the talks went well. The West’s sanctions on Russia are in response to the country’s seizure of Crimea and its ongoing support for the separatists still fighting in Ukraine. European leaders continue to ask Russia to ensure Putin and Poroshenko adhere to the ceasefire signed last month. Deadly violence between pro-Russia and pro-West groups still plagues regions of Ukraine. Local elections and drone surveillance of the Russia-Ukraine borders were hot topics Friday, as well. Russia wants its drones surveying alongside France’s and Germany’s. [Source: Reuters]

Small earthquake rattles Banff

A small, 2.7 magnitude earthquake rattled Banff Thursday night, injuring none but surprising many. Scientist Garry Rogers, with the Geological Survey of Canada, called the event, which could be felt about four kilometres from the tourist town, a “micro-earthquake. If you’re right on top of it, it might be upsetting, but generally people in the region would just feel a mild shaking of just a second or two.” Quakes are rare in Banff. They’re rare in Canada, period. The largest reported earthquake in the area was the 6-magnitude doozy of 1918. Katie Kennedy felt last night’s tremors and told CTV News, “It was pretty freaky.” We believe you, Katie. It would be freaky for us, too. [Source: Global News]

Comet passes Mars once every million years, and it’s doing so on Sunday

There’s nothing in this world more charming, more heart-warming, than a room full of space nerds excited about a space discovery. News reports don’t put it this way, but we’re willing to wager it will be the scene at NASA when a comet that only appears once every million years passes close to Mars on Sunday. It’s said to be the size of a small mountain. The Siding Spring comet, made of ice, will get within 140,006 kilometres from Mars and pass it by at a speed of 202,767 kilometres per hour. NASA’s robots stationed on Mars are standing by to snap photos. But of its five rovers, Opportunity and Curiosity may have the best vantage points. “We’re getting ready for a spectacular set of observations,” said NASA’s Jim Green. And so is the space agency’s Kelly Fast: “We certainly have fingers crossed for the first images of a comet from the surface of another world.” The phenomenon will be visible from Earth, but only via powerful binoculars or a telescope. The best vantage points are said to be from the Southern Hemisphere, with South Africa and Australia as prime locations. The comet was reportedly formed about 4.5 billion years ago, near the beginning of our solar system. [Source: CTV News]

Honourable mention goes to a doll that craps charm bracelets. Watch video below. It’s creepy.

[su_youtube url=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXexeL3IQbI” width=”500″]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXexeL3IQbI[/su_youtube]

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Follow Toban Dyck’s staid antics at @tobandyck 

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